Problems Of A First Year English Major Student – I Don’t Like What People Say

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I would like to believe that I’m a nice guy, I’m nice to everyone I interact with and I am always one to say please an thank you but there are a couple of thing that I don’t seem to understand when it comes to basic interactions with people and I am always seen as an ass for asking clarity on these misunderstandings of mine and it sometimes hurts, not really but i felt like putting that there would make me seem more human. To be more specific there are two phrases that I never seam to understand and I thought I should, in the safety of my blog, just post my queries and maybe get an answer without being called an idiot or something like, that so here goes. In the name of equality I thought I should pick out one phrase from each gender, and it’s also because I didn’t want to seam sexist and give people another reason to shout at me, so here are the two phrases that always baffle me and I’m hoping that I will be able to get help here: From the women: “dress to impress” For some reason unknown to me women always find a way to utter these words to everyone, both women and men, who is preparing to go out and have a jol. There are two questions I have regarding this phrase and I am still to find an answer for any of them, my questions are:

  1. What does “dress to impress mean”?

This might sound like a stupid question but I really don’t know what “dress to impress” means. Does it mean that when I pick clothes from cupboard, which has a very limited number of clothes in it by the way, I should pick those that are going to impress people or does it mean that I should pick clothes that I believe will impress people? These two things might sound like the same thing but they are not, for instance to pick something that will impress people means that if I am going to a hip hop club I would have to wear clothes that would impress people who are into hip hop and its culture, this means that I would have to wear something like what Kanye West would wear – if you were to ever find me wearing that kilt he likes wearing I’m giving you permission to kill me – because hip hop people tend to like what he wears. While on the other hand wearing something I believe would impress people means that I would go into my small drawer and pull out my chinos and my black long sleeve t-shirt because I believe that no matter where I am people would be impressed when I’m wearing those clothes. WHICH ONE IS IT?

  1. How would I know if I impressed those I am dressed to impress?

This question is very important, especially for women, because I can tell you now that a majority of guys stop noticing what you are wearing as soon as they have a couple drinks in them. Not to say that we don’t care how well you are clothed but I’m sure that if you ladies think back to the last time you got picked up by a guy from a club, and don’t act like you haven’t, and count the number of times he complemented you clothes you will at most get to 3, and all counts were done while he was sober. How do you know as a person that this person is talking to me because they are ‘impressed” by my clothing or they are talking to be because they want to leave with me tonight? And to test my theory, ladies the next time you get picked up by a guy from a club and end up in his bed, the first thing you should ask him in the morning is what was I wearing last night and a majority of the time he won’t remember.

 

From the men: “this is going to sound gay”

Now my struggles with this one are more technical than anything else. My problem with this phrase is that when guys say it I always pick up the sense that they believe that people can determine if you are gay or not base on what you say, and how you say it, and this has stopped guys from talking to each other in an open way. When guys say this phrase they usually say it to stop people from believing that they are gay/homosexual which brings me to my query, do people know that homosexuality or being gay is a sexual orientation and has nothing to do with what you say or how you say it? Something cannot, in any way, sound gay because the only way for something to be gay is if it feels sexually attracted to other things of the same species as it which are of the same sex as it, sounds confusing but it’s true. So guys, it does not matter what you say or how you say it, your vocabulary can not determine if you are a homosexual or not.

This has become so bad that guy would rather not give other guys complements because they don’t want to be seen as gay. I know I might be reading too much into these things but ever since I started studying English and the use of language I have picked up that people usually speak and don’t know what they are saying.

I know I am not one to judge because I have my own faults and everything but I can sit idle while there things that are really bothering me, and besides I’m using this as an excuse for me to practice my writing skills.

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